Time Killing Conventions
Annoying Phone Scam Person: "Hello, we are calling about a red alert coming from your computer, someone is trying to hack through your IP address, please go turn on your computer so we can fix it."
Me: "Ok, what is my IP address?"
APSP: "...sorry?"
Me: "Well if someone is trying to hack it, you must know the IP address too. So what's my IP address?"
APSP: *hangs up*